I sent Happy New Year texts to the captains of The Sting, my fastball team. Brett wrote back that he hoped I had enough sauerkraut and that the Diet Coke was flowing.
There is a Community Watch driver who stops whenever he sees me walking and tells me a joke. Before Christmas, he stopped and gave me a bunch of his jokes that he had typed up. I finally got around to reading them today, because I was worried he would see me tonight and stop and ask if I had read the jokes.
Here is one of them: Today, I drove up to a gas station to get some gas and something to eat. I noticed a policeman watching this man who was smoking a cigarette while pumping his gas. Anyway, I go inside, get my food, and as the cashier gives me my change, I hear someone screaming outside. I look out the window and see this man's arm is on fire. He was swinging his arm around and running around like a crazy man. I hurried outside and saw the policeman had the man on the ground and was putting the fire out with his coffee. Then he proceeded to handcuff the man and put him in the back of his police car. Being a noisy person, I asked the policeman what he was charging him with. He looked me dead in the face and said, "Waving a firearm!"
Only in the USA would that be funny, eh?
