Delayed

We rang in the New Year listening to the party on my radio station from Ottawa on the computer.  Then when it came to the countdown, Laura set up her phone on her bluetooth speaker.  We were all in the kitchen counting down the seconds and I noticed that Laura's phone was about 30 second later than the computer.  So we sort of missed the turning into the New Year but we celebrated anyway.

DJ Scooter

We went to see DJ Scooter at the Village Square on New Year's Eve.  DJ Scooter leads everyone in strange and funny aerobic dances.  He dances for the whole 4 hours and doesn't take a break.  It is funny because he doesn't look like he is in great shape.  It was really crowded because he is so popular.  We all danced and it was hot. So we really worked up a sweat.  As Sarah says The Villages has the best parties because they all end at 9 o'clock.

Old Guy

Laura came to watch my softball practice and she was sitting in the stands beside the diamond while we were taking batting practice.  One of the old guys went over to talk to her through the fence.  Later I asked her what he said to her.  Laura said he said that Laura must really not have anything to do to come out and watch a bunch of old men hit slowpitch softballs.

Julia in the Front Seat

Barb and I were upset that we couldn't turn off the car stereo.  If we didn't want music playing, we could only turn down the sound to zero.  Barb thought that Julia should sit up in the front seat with her when we drove around so that she could see all the sites.  The first thing Julia did when she got in the car was hit the button to turn off the radio.  Barb and I freaked out we were so happy that we now knew how to turn off the radio.

Pool

We went to the pool together one evening and Barb led us in her water aerobics.  It was a good workout and I could only do some of it.  The girls were able to do it along with Barb.

Laura's Friend

One of Laura's friends messaged her and asked if she would like to be picked up at the Seattle Airport.  Laura thought that was great and would mean she wouldn't have to take trains and buses back to Vancouver.  So she was excitedly making arrangement to have a fun day with her friend in Seattle when she was getting picked up.  Then she realized that she had her dates wrong and was not arriving on the day that her friend could pick her up but the next day instead and he wasn't available that day.  We have so much trouble figuring out Laura's travel itinerary.

Bocce Ball

We played a few games of Bocce Ball and it was Barb and Julia against me and Laura.  We were not very good and didn't really know the rules.  But we played it sort of like curling and Laura and I finally beat Barb at something. We won a close game 13-11.

Shuffleboard

We played a few games of shuffleboard and Barb won all the games easily.  One night we were getting ready to go home because it was getting dark and we thought it closed at dusk like everything else.  The man from the park came and took away the water jug and paper cups.  He said something to Barb about lights but Barb didn't hear him clearly and said no we were just leaving.  We were waiting for Laura in the bathroom and Barb was wandering around and she found a switch and when she turned it the lights came on.  It was like the only thing in the park that you can play at night.

Corn Hole

We were playing corn hole which we know as bean bag toss.  It was really difficult because the target was so far away and there was only one hole.  We played for about an hour and Barb got 7 and beat us all combined.  I got 3 and Julia got 2 and Laura got 0.

Fun Game

While Barb and Julia were playing, I was bouncing a ball on my paddle on the bench beside the court and I missed the ball and it went out on the court.  A lady, who was there waiting, got mad at me and went and picked up the ball and took it away from me.  Then her friend came and she asked Barb and Julia if they wanted to play a fun game.  So it was Barb and Julia against these two ladies.  Barb started the game serving.  She wasn't even trying.  They were only trying to keep the rally goiing and Barb served nine points in a row.  The ladies said they only play to 9 not 11.  So Barb and Julia beat them 9-0 and they never even got a chance to serve.

Aw Shucks

When we got back to The Villages from Best Buy, we checked the pickleball courts to see if Barb and Julia were there playing.  They were using half of the court in a game of skinny singles.  So Laura and I decided to use the other half of the court to play skinny singles.  Laura laughed every time I hit the ball into the net because I would punch down with both hands and say Aw Shucks.

Phone Adventure Part 7

Sometime later I was at my softball field but I couldn't find a parking space and was going to be late to sign in.  So I phoned my coach and told him I was at the park and he signed me in and thanked me for phoning.

Phone Adventure Part 6

So we went home and Laura ordered me a Tracphone SIM card.  When the SIM card arrived a few days later, we phoned Tracphone and tried to set it up on an old flip phone that one of Barb's friends had given her when they left the country.  I phoned Tracphone and couldn't get any person to talk to.  I had to put in my phone number but when I did they said that number was no longer active.  So then I said I wanted to create a new phone number.  So it asked me to put in my plan number but I didn't have a plan.  I thought I was stuck and Barb was listening to me getting mad and she kept saying I don't need a phone, I could use her car to go to softball.  Eventually, I found a way to get to a person and got the phone set up with a 90 day plan for $20.  We tested it and it worked. 

Phone Adventure Part 5

At Best Buy, we saw the SIM cards for my Boost Mobile phone but thought we should ask the help desk.  We had to wait a long time because the three people there were helping people who looked really helpless.  When we finally got help, we found out that there was no pay-as-you-go plan on Boost Mobile.  You had to buy a monthly data plan.  So then we looked a little further at Tracphones which I thought had a pay-as-you-go plan.  We were standing reading the fine print on the Tracphone brochure and immediately a helper came up to ask if she could help us.  She told us that we had to order a SIM card by phoning them and they would send it in the mail.  Also Tracphone only worked for flip phones.  Then we could buy a cheap plan. 

Phone Adventure Part 4

As we were leaving Walmart, Laura saw a display of silly Christmas sweaters on sale at half price.  She found a Jack Skelington sweater exactly like the one the Barb got her for Christmas.  We wanted to buy it for her circus partner back in Canada so they can look identical.  She gave me $10 and I went to buy it with my American Credit Card.  When I paid for it, I found out that it only $5.  What a bargain!

Phone Adventure Part 3

We eventually asked the man at the counter at Walmart and he said that they don't have SIM cards anymore.  So Laura got on the Walmart wifi and looked up Best Buy and we drove back and found it right beside the drugstore that we were at originally. 

Phone Adventure Part 2

So we went in and looked around Walmart and couldn't find any.  While we were looking, there was another customer wandering around.  He was a middle-aged guy with a short pony tail but he was well dressed.  As he was walking past Laura, he let out a loud fart and pretended nothing happened.  Laura couldn't believe it. 

Phone Adventure Part 1

Laura and I went to get a phone card for me.  Barb didn't think I needed a phone but I didn't trust my car and thought I might need to phone my coach if my car broke down on the way to softball.  So Laura and I went to the drugstore where I thought I had seen phone cards.  We looked for them there but they were top up cards not SIM cards.  We asked the lady at the counter where we could get a SIM card and she said maybe Best Buy.  I thought I knew where Best Buy was and started driving in the wrong direction.  Eventually when we couldn't find Best Buy, I decided we would drive to Walmart.  Laura had read on the internet that Walmart sold SIM cards. 

Pool Conversation

Julia liked going to the pool by herself.  Barb didn't like going to the pool in the daytime because it was so crowded she couldn't do your aerobics but Julia liked to go and just eavesdrop on the conversations of all the old people.  She liked the nice light conversations about the weather and where they were from and the weather back home.

Dreams

We were playing Scattergories and the subject was things you dream about and the letter was A.  So I said that I dream about Animals, Answers and Alphabet.

Enterprise

Sarah was renting a car at The Villages and we didn't even know there was a rent-a-car place in The Villages.  So we looked it up on the internet and there was a picture of the Enterprise office with a long line of golf carts outside that could be rented.  Sarah said that she had rented the cheapest car available and we joked her that probably the golf carts were the cheapest cars available and we could imagine her driving to Orlando to pick up Ali at the airport in a golf cart.

Zumba

We took the girls to the live music in The Square.  The place was filled with line dancers.  There was hardly any space to dance.  The girls found a space on the far side of the stage and Julia led the girls in a Zumba demonstration.  Barb had to sit and watch because she felt it would be too hard on her knees but Laura and Sarah seemed to have a good time following Julia.

Chess

Sarah and I played chess on a big chess board at one of the community centres.  The others were waiting for us to finish and were rushing us along.  We both made a number of mistakes and then when we finally got the endgame.  It almost ended in a stalemate where Sarah could not make a legal move on her turn.

Gates

We wanted to go for a walk on the nature trail after the Putt Putt.  The nature trail was back at the community centre.  So we drove back and parked and got out beside the entrance to the nature trail.  I saw a worker walking on the boardwalk and thought Oh No she is locking the gate.  And I was right it closed at dusk and was all locked up.

Parking

Barb was told that you had to park and walk a few blocks to get to the Putt Putt.  So we parked where we saw a few people with putters and started walking.  It was a long way and it was getting late.  When we found the Putt Putt, Barb went up to the manager and asked about where we rent putters.  The man said that you had to go back to the Community Centre.  So we drove back about a mile to the Community Centre and since I was the only one with their Villages ID card, I went in to see about the putters.  The man said he only had four putters but I could have them and two of us would have to share.  So we took the putters and drove back all the way past the Putt Putt and parked at a different and closer parking lot.  We played Putt Putt and it was fun but we didn't keep score because none of us were any good.  We were behind a large family who were playing really slowly and we had to wait at each hole for a long time.  We were happy when they went home early and didn't finish the course.

Divided Highway

We were driving to the other side of The Villages to a Putt Putt game.  It was a long drive into an area that was new and still under construction in some areas.  Barb was driving and pointing out things to the girls.  She thought it was a two lane divided highway because there was a median and two lanes on the other side of the median but those two lanes were still under construction.  So it turned out that the highway was just two single lanes and Barb was driving down the road on the wrong side of the road.  She didn't realize it until she saw another car coming right at her.  Fortunately, she was able to swerve back into the right lane.

Scattergories

We had this game called Scattergories we had never played.  So Barb got it out and Julia read us the rules.  It involved rolling a dice with 26 sides. Each side had a letter of the alphabet on it.  Then there was a list of subjects and each of us was supposed to try to write down three things in each of the categories that start with the letter.  It was hard to think of things because your mind would get stuck on something and you couldn't think of anything else.  Also you had to have original things.  If someone else had your word, it didn't count.  So it was a funny game.  We would roll the dice and then sit quietly for a few minutes thinking and then start reading off our words.  We would scream at each other if someone had the same word as us and we would scream at each other if someone thought of an original word that was so obvious we should have thought of it ourselves.

Orange Juicer

We picked a lot of oranges and then we were going to squeeze them using my sisters juicer while Barb was cooking dinner.  Barb told us to wait and then she gave me a special present that she said she should have given me earlier.  It was a super heavy duty manual orange juicer that I couldn't break.  We had a great production line squeezing about five bags of oranges into five one litre jugs.  Julia had found the juicer at Sam's when they had all gone there the other day.  Barb had never noticed them before.

Speaker

Laura bought Sarah a bluetooth speaker shaped like a pile of poop.  Sarah hooked it up to her phone and played Christmas carols from Spotify for us to open presents by.

Yet Another Sweater

Barb bought Laura a Jack Skelington Nightmare Before Christmas sweater that was a children's small and it fit perfectly.

Wrapping

Laura got the greatest laugh out of my wrapping challenges.  I have great difficulty estimating how much paper to cut out to wrap each present and I often need little pieces of wrapping paper to cover the part of the presents that weren't covered by the original piece.  Laura got a particular laugh out of the little square of paper that I used on the bottom of the Pringles can.

Straws

Laura knew that I reused my straws when I drink my diet Pepsi out of a can.  So she got a friend of hers to buy a set of stainless steel straws for me for Christmas.  I opened up the present on Christmas morning and didn't know what they were.  I thought they were something that needed to be assembled and the first thing I did was try to put them together.  Laura got it on video and it was very funny.

Choked

Barb was taking her vitamin pills before bed and Julia was talking about how good the singing of our Christmas carols was on our side of the room compared to her side of the room and rolled her eyes as she pointed to where Barb was sitting.  Barb started laughing at the face Julia made and started choking on her pills.

Bananas

Barb took us for a walk around the neighbourhood.  She wanted to show us the banana tree on the neighbour's front lawn that had a bunch of little green bananas growing on it.  We had never seen bananas growing in the wild.  It was very strange.

Paddles

We were sitting at the dinner table and of course pickleball came up in conversation.  When pickleball came up, Barb turned around in her chair and without getting up she opened the cupboard behind her and pulled out a couple of pickleball paddles.  Sarah said only Barb could do that.

Another Sweater

Before the girls got here, Barb was working on a sweater for Sarah.  She didn't quite finish it in time but she kept working on it after they arrived and she tried to hide what she was knitting.  She finally finished it but she didn't like how it looked.  I didn't notice any problem but Barb is a perfectionist.  So Sarah tried it on to make sure it fit and then Barb unwound the sweater and started again.

Sweater

Barb found a design for a little knitted sweater and made one as a present to give to one of her friends if she was invited to a Christmas party.  There were a lot of different designs.  Barb made one that looked like a Christmas tree.  As soon as Laura saw it, she wanted to put it on Agumon and it fit perfectly.  Barb and Laura looked through all the patterns and picked out a few Laura thought Agumon would like.

Guatemalans

Barb saw a lady next store picking weeds in the garden.  She looked foreign so Barb thought she was the maid.  She found out it was the neighbour's wife.  Sarah said Barb was so racist. We had not seen her before.  Barb started talking to her about the sculptures on our tree and called them Guatemalans.  Barb meant to say iguanas but they are not iguanas either.  They are geckos.  The neighbour's wife used to be a big time tennis player and instructor.  She said she hurt her shoulder.  She said her husband plays tennis too.  Barb was surprised and asked her how he can play with a cane.  She said he has figured out how to play with his cane and he is pretty good.  The neighbour's wife told Barb how impressed she was that Barb would climb a ladder and clean out our gutters in a dress.  She thought Barb was so energetic walking so fast and with such good posture.

Terminal B

I thought we should meet at the baggage claim but Barb, Sarah and Julia said they would meet Laura and I at the car.  I said we were in Terminal A.  Then I found out we were in Terminal B but Julia never got that message.  So Laura and I went to our car in the Terminal B garage.  We waited and waited and then I got a message from Julia saying they were in the Terminal A garage and couldn't find the car.  I said that was because it was in Terminal B garage.  They wanted us to come back in the terminal and find them but I said no just find Terminal B garage.  Then Laura said she had to go to the toilet and she went back into the terminal.  I waited and waited and then Julia, Sarah and Barb arrived but Laura wasn't there.  Finally, Laura came back and we loaded up the car.  Barb was amazed that Laura's stuff was already in the car because she thought she was the only one with a fobb to open the car but I had mine too.

Three Girls

All three girls arrived on the same day which made it very convenient for us to pick them up at the airport.  Laura arrived first but was very sleep deprived at 5:05 am so she had a nap while she waited for Sarah arrive from Toronto and Julia to arrive from Ottawa.  We had a little trouble finding the right gates but we had no trouble finding Sarah and Julia when they came into the airport.  However, Laura wasn't replying to our messages and we couldn't find her.  Barb and the girls went down to baggage claim and I went to look for Laura.  Laura had sent us a picture of where she was sleeping in front of a picture of some Minions.  But there were lots of pictures of Minions in the airport.  I searched Terminal B and then I walked to Terminal A and found her lying across two seats with her scarf over her eyes.  I went up to her and pushed her and said she would have to leave the airport in a deep voice.  She woke up with a start not knowing where she was and who was talking to her.  I guess her phone had died and so her alarm didn't go off when she was supposed to wake up and meet us.  Barb was amazed that I was able to find her at all.

Carry On

Laura freaked out when she found out that she had to pay for carry on baggage on her Spirit flight.  She had packed specifically so that she would minimize the cost of her luggage.  I had read good things about Spirit and when I looked it up on Wikipedia it said that it was the first Ultra Low Cost Airline.  I guess it is Ultra Low Cost if you have no luggage.  Anyway Laura had to pay $45 for her checked bag and $47 for her carry on.

Rain Juicer

I thought it would be fun for the girls to squeeze the juice from a few oranges from our tree at Christmas time.  I had broken our two electric juicers last year and I knew that my sister had a manual juicer.  So I emailed her to ask her to bring it with her when she came at Christmas.  She replied that she had three juicers.  So I replied asking her to bring them all.  When I replied I realized that the title of my email was Rain Juicer instead of Orange Juicer.  Damn spellchecker.

Password

Laura always has trouble with her credit card.  It wouldn't work when she wanted to buy her flight to Florida.  So I bought it for her and she sent me an e-transfer to pay me back today.  Her password question had the answer Ilikeitrunny.

Too Sad

Our neighbour who lives behind us has only one leg.  He often sits out in the back of his house which is also the back of our house and we can see him through our bedroom window.  Today, Barb saw him out in his wheelchair trying to rake the leaves.  Barb said it too sad to watch.

Dress Up

Barb was invited to a party in which she was supposed to dress up as something she wanted to be.  She said she had everything she wanted and didn't want anything else.  So she didn't know what to dress up as and didn't want to go to the party.  So over dinner we were talking about it.  I suggested a few things that she thought might work but weren't great.  Then she remembered how she had wanted to become an American citizen so she could stay in Florida longer than her six months.  So she thought she would dress up as an American.  Her friend had a lot of American flag paraphernalia.  And she had a great costume for the party.  She had a skirt, a shirt, shoes and gloves and a visor and even gloves.  She also bought a balloon and a few little flags.  Again she was mad a me because even though I didn't think of the idea by just talking it over with me she got the idea and she asked me why I hadn't helped her earlier and stopped all her worry.

Ms Fix-It

Barb had broken the little connection on the shower that holds the shower hose in place last year.  She had tried to glue it back together with Gorilla Glue and Super Glue but it kept breaking off again.  She was worried she would have to replace the whole shower pipe out of the wall.  She was showing me what she meant and when she showed me she found out that the little connection could be screwed off separately.  So she screwed it off and took it to Home Depot and got a replacement for $3.  When she put it on it worked like new.  Barb is always mad a me because she struggles over everything for months and then she shows me and just like that she figures it out.  She always says I should help her right away instead of letting her struggle.

The Fun One

One of Barb's friends was asking a man at pickleball who was at the courts yesterday and he said among others Deb was there.  Her friend said which Deb. There are lots of Debs.  The guy said the Fun One.  The friend said that none of the Debs were really fun ones.  But he insisted that it was the Fun One.  Then when the guy described what the fun Deb looked like Barb's friend realized that he meant Barb.  And he said yes Barb.

Banana

Barb's friend had to go back to Pennsylvania to prepare her house for sale.  She was in a hurry and is a little scatterbrained normally.  So after she left, Barb got a message from her asking Barb to go into her house and get a banana out of her blender that she had forgotten about.

Steps

Barb was happy because her fitbit said she did 5000 steps after 2 hours of pickleball in the morning.  Then she did 3000 steps wandering around the house in the afternoon and evening.  She started competing with Sarah, Haleigh, Ali and Sarah Woodend for the most steps in the work week.  Her fitbit would tell her to get up and take it for a walk if she was sitting too long.  And her phone would tell her if she was in the lead or if Haleigh had overtaken her.  So if Haleigh overtook her, she got up and started walking around the house.  She even started walking while she was knitting and while she was reading her book.  She had a daily competition with Haleigh.

Sleep

Barb thought the sleep monitor on her fitbit was neat.  That was one of the things she found didn't work well on Laura's fitbit.  She was showing me how it monitored her light, deep and REM sleep by the minute and produced a timeline of her night.  Then she went to look at something else on her phone and when she came back to her sleep information she had a second copy of the sleep timeline.  Then she had a third copy and a fourth copy.  So she tried to delete the copies and when she pressed the delete key, she deleted all of them and lost all of her data.  Barb found she only gets 6 hours of light sleep and gets very little REM sleep and even less deep sleep.

Bands

Barb bought two Fitbits because she found the one that Laura had given us didn't have all the features she wanted.  For example, she thought it was ripping her off on her steps during pickleball and it lied about her sleep time.  I didn't like the Fitbit she bought for me because I thought it looked too feminine.  I also thought the one Laura gave me was working well for the steps on my daily walk.  Barb had a tough time picking the band colour she wanted.  Then she found that she could buy a whole collections of different coloured plastic bands.  When she got the bands, she was trying them out in the bedroom and dressing in her pickleball outfits and seeing how they looked in the mirror.  Then she would walk from the bedroom in the back of the house to my office to show me each one.  I told her she was getting lots of steps in by walking back and forth from the bedroom to the office so many times.  She had about 10 different coloured bands and had to try on each one, sometimes with more than one outfit.  She used 1400 calories just trying them out.